Countless
daily acts of violence create a
climate of fear and powerlessness
that limits women's freedom of action
and controls many of the movements
of our lives. The threat of male
violence continues to keep us from
stepping out from behind the traditional
roles that we, as women, have been
taught. Violence and the threat
of violence keep us "in our place."
Now
that I am on my own and living free
of my abuser, I can see how my life
was altered when I was being battered.
Little by little, he isolated me
from my friends, he convinced me
to quit working, he complained about
how I kept the house, he kept track
of the mileage on the car to make
sure that I wasn't going anywhere.
Eventually, when the beatings were
regular and severe, I had no one
to turn to and I felt completely
alone.
On the surface, it seems that men
benefit from sexism--from this system
of male dominance, control, and
violence. On a deeper level, we
know that sexism harms men as well
as women. Sexism, and more specifically
violence against women, harms men
because it harms the women and girls
in their lives and because it keeps
them from having positive and loving
relationships with women. In recent
years, some men have begun to recognize
and acknowledge the ways in which
relating violently toward women
(and other men) harms them. Groups
like "Real Men" and "Men to End
Sexism" have been working to raise
consciousness among other men and
to teach men how to be allies of
women in the effort to bring an
end to violence against women.
