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I actually think that feminism's goal is
to liberate boys as much as it is to liberate
girls, but I think that we have had to work
with girls first - or at least they've been
an easier target. As much as girls are held
back by a perception of "weakness," boys
are held back by assuming that they have
to be masculine and tough. We have to liberate
each gender from those stereotypes. While
we have shown girls that they can embrace
the "masculine" things in life, like the
40-hour work week, sports and adventure,
we haven't yet made it okay for the boys
to embrace the "feminine" things - like
being emotional and sitting at home reading.
If a boy chooses these things, he is still
subjected to ridicule.
When
the Ms. Foundation started "Take Our
Daughters to Work Day", they wanted
to create an equivalent "Take Our Sons Home
Day." There have been many boys'/men's projects
that have been created over the past couple
of years like The Fatherhood Project based
in Minnesota. We have lots of men and men's
organizations who are beginning to work
to end violence - like Men Can Stop Rape
and Vital Link, which actually works with
the perpetrators.
Susan
Faludi's last book, Stiffed, examined
how men are short-changed by society and
Carol Gilligan's new research is focused
on boys. This is all to say that I think
other feminists identified the problems
that you have identified and so realized
that we needed to direct energies there
as well. I see this in my own work - specifically
around the issue of violence and sexual
abuse. For a girl to admit to her violation
is to label her a victim, but for a boy
it's also emasculating, which is like a
double assault.
Specific
to your son, I don't think it's so important
that he embrace women's history, but that
he understands the equal value of men and
women. I hope that helps.
Amy
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