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I've never wrote to an advice
column before but I hope you
can help me I am between a
rock and a hard place, and
really need some advice (and
its about a man, it always
is).
So I've been dating a guy
for about 2 years now and the
first six months were great!!!
I fell in love but as soon
as I did he changed...how you
asked well let me tell you.
First the arguing started and
most of the fights were so
stupid we were misunderstanding
each other and what not. so
I would usually apologise just
to end the fight. Well then
the arguing turned to screaming
and cursing a lot then he started
pushing me down to the ground
army style and trying to make
me stay because at that point
I was trying to leave I wanted
outta there. Then he started
telling me he was gonna take
my dog from me if I left him
and how I wouldn’t like
what was gonna happen if I
did leave, so I felt like he
intimidated me to stay with
him. Well needless to say the
more time went on the worse
he got. well one day I had
to be at work at 8 when normally
I wasn’t needed until
about 9:30 well he sprayed
me with a hose because I had
makeup on and he said it was
to early to be dolled up and
then when I tried to leave
he chased me down the street
and I got away...yayy me!
Well I get to my coworkers
(a girl) and the police pull
in behind me and arrest me
and I am held in jail on a
48 hour hold for domestic violence/
assault with a deadly weapon.
The bastard told the cops I
ran him over and it broke his
jaw and broke his arm.. he
later dropped the bogus charges
and I moved out immediately.
well the first night at my
new house my friend and brother
had drove up from outta town
and as we were leaving another
friends house my ex chased
the three of us with his cousins
car, there were five of his
family members against the
three of us and they were trying
to fight us because I broke
up with him. (He told them
I cheated on him and that’s
who the two guys were) one
was my brother that’s
how jealous my ex is (he is
sick in the head)well I called
the police and they talked
with the cousins and my ex
and they were let free, then
the cops were mad at us 3 and
we were the ones who were attacked.
Well some time went by and
he sucked up so much I thought
he changed and we got back
together well since then he
broke the windshield on my
car and denied it I called
the police for that and after
questioning us they said I
was trying to commit insurance
fraud then my boyfriend took
off running and he had them
on the run for about 6 hours
before they caught him they
took him to jail and the whole
two months he was in jail he
told me he was framed and he
didn’t do it even though
he plead guilty to it and is
now on probation with a curfew
well I moved about an hour
away and he gave them my address
when he was released from jail
and he said he had nowhere
to go he begged and pleaded
until I let him stay.
One night the cops came to
the house and found drugs in
his possession and I got charged
with that and ended having
to bond outta jail (I never
was in trouble before I met
him.) Then they charged me
for felony larceny because
he stole a fridge and stove
from a previous landlord. I
had nothing to do with that
I didn’t even know about
it . Well I have asked him
to leave my new house and he
replies "make me" every
time. He says if I break up
with him when it comes time
to go to court for these charges
that he will stand up and tell
them he saw me doing it so
I feel trapped I don’t
want to get in trouble with
the courts but if I stay with
him I'm afraid he is gonna
poison me or something crazy..
I have caught him cheating
on me several different times,
he admitted to me one day about
a year into our relationship
that he has fathered eleven
yes...eleven children. He screams
at me stays out all night,
sleeps at other women’s
condos and lies about it but
when I try to do something
about it he threatens to call
the cops on me and have me
arrested.
He tells me he will plant
drugs in my room for them to
find so I will go to jail,
he threatens to break all my
stuff and hurt my dogs. If
I try to leave he will lay
behind my car tires so I cant
move, or if I get away he will
chase me. He cusses me at work
in the grocery in front of
my friends. He refuses to let
me go anywhere unless he comes
to. And now that it is summer
break he has two of his eleven
kids down for a couple moths
so I couldn’t
kick him out if I wanted to.
He tells the kids I hate them
and that I am making them sleep
on the street because I don’t
care. I own my own shop and
he had a copy to my store hidden
from me that I found. He has
stolen over $2500.00 cash from
me!!
He is just a jerk and I want
nothing more to do with him
but I feel like I cant do anything
to make him leave until after
the court date. He is supposed
to testify in my defense about
the stolen appliances, but
will go against me if I leave
him! He is always hurting me
by pulling my hair or grabbing
me, tackling me, slapping me
in the face. This past Christmas
he threw rocks at me and punched
me twice because he had to
much to drink. I had a busted
lip and a black eye Christmas
morning when I woke up He is
always twisting the truth to
make me feel like it's all
my fault and I know it's not.
I feel like I am stuck in this
crappy relationship but I can't
get away. There is so much
more about him that I haven’t
even touched on yet I could
go on for days.
Please tell me how to handle
this situation? I have never
dealt with someone this insane
in my entire existence, what
should I do???? Sorry for the
long letter, but it feels good
to tell someone anonymous!
Thanks,
—The Prisoner of a Man |
