Dear Amy:

My Husband and I have been Married 11 years. We have been together for 13. I was so vary happy for 10 of those years but the last 3 have been living in Hell.

His son moved here from Montana he is a grown man with 4 children and has lost everything 3 times over since he moved here, his kids his partner who is not a nice person. Our life together has been very strained due to all of the problems with his son and his kids. He has started to push me around, verbally abuse me which he did before but it has gotten to a point that I can not deal with anymore. I have many animals in my house which we are buying. I work everyday and just want to figure out how to keep my house and everything I have worked so hard for. Of course then I have to fugure out where the money will come from. I am constanly crying and upset and am having a hard time going to work everyday. I need help.

-DL

Dear DL,

I'm so sorry to hear about your situation, but honestly happy that you are taking control. I think it's very crucial that you don't let the possibility of the future overshadow the reality of today -- it sounds like a miserable situation and one that you will want to escape as soon as possible. I don't know what state you live in, but every state and really every judge has a different approach and I think that you should document what you went into the marraige with as well as the abuse -- both of these things will be crucial for the outcome. But remember, it's better to take a risk than to sacrifice your happiness.

Take care,

— Amy