Two women I admire recently challenged
me to think about what feminism should
mean. First I heard from Jennifer,
who is in high school, and with whom
I've been emailing about sexism, justice,
idealism and activism. She said she
was sure there were multiple definitions
of feminism, but she wanted to know
mine. I was just beginning to collect
my thoughts on sex inequality and
its relationship to other forms of
inequality, when I received an email
from one of my best friends from law
school. In it, Rachel had pasted a
column by Shelby Steele, a prominent
Black scholar who is vehemently opposed
to treating gay marriage as a civil
rights issue.
Mr. Steele believes that activists
for gay marriage are wrong to "glibly
invoke the civil rights movement and
all its iconic imagery to justify
their agendas for social change."
Likening them to upper-middle-class
white women who both ignored and perpetuated
racism during the women's movement
of the early '70s, Mr. Steele says
that gay people (who appear to be
distinct in his mind from people of
color) are an "already free people
struggl(ing) for complete social acceptance
and (a) sense of normalcy." In
Mr. Steele's view, this struggle is
petty compared to the fight for racial
equality. Moreover, since (in his
view) marriage is an institution centered
on procreation, the fight for it is
evidence that gay people are in denial
that they are fundamentally different
from straight people.
I strongly disagree with most of
the premises and all of the conclusions
put forward by Mr. Steele. Activists
working for gay marriage (many of
whom are people of color) are not
saying they deserve to marry because
anti-gay bigotry is as bad as racist
oppression-but because it is wrong.
Nor is the existence of "difference,"
however defined, an acceptable justification
for the current social and legal inequities
that burden the lives of gay men and
lesbians.
But Mr. Steele's article struck a
chord with Rachel, which alone compels
me to consider it seriously. Rachel,
who is Black (I am white), is one
of the smartest people I know, a committed
feminist and supporter of gay and
lesbian equality, and from her I have
learned more than she could possibly
imagine about feminism, inequality
in law and life, motherhood, work
and family, friendship, and complexity.
While not endorsing Steele's argument,
Rachel urged me to see that he was
right to raise issues that must be
central to anyone fighting injustice:
the persistence of race inequality,
the realities of white privilege,
and the exploitation by white people
of the rhetoric and teachings of civil
rights struggles against racism.
Rachel reminded me that white feminists
continue to benefit from racial inequalities,
and too frequently fail to work against
them, even while fighting sex discrimination.
While I had been struck by Steele's
disregard for how marriage is but
one way that gay men and lesbians
are relegated to second-class status
in this country, Rachel saw his appreciation
for the ways our society tolerates
race inequality, even while claiming
to value the teachings of leaders
like Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. She
helped me see that while the struggle
for gay marriage is an important civil
rights movement, any suggestion that
it is the civil rights movement of
our time comes dangerously close to
implying that race inequality is a
problem that was conquered during
the "last" civil rights
movement.
Given the continuing and disproportionate
presence of people of color living
in poverty and in our nation's prisons,
it is idiotic to believe that race
inequality is a thing of the past.
As long as race remains a statistical
predictor of poverty, illness, or
incarceration, race equality does
not exist. However, a "been-there,
solved-that-problem" attitude
pervades American thinking on the
subject. Opposition to affirmative
action, for example, is widespread,
and appears to be based on the belief
that racial inequality is a thing
of the past. In this context, and
in a world where the mass media furthers
the myth that gay people are all white
and wealthy (not to mention singularly
obsessed with looking fabulous), it
is no surprise that many people of
color would bristle at seeing their
struggles for equality invoked in
the debates over gay marriage.
But appreciating some of the reasons
that advocates of racial equality
might oppose the fight for gay marriage
is different from agreeing with, or
accepting, their opposition. Although
it is critical to value the leadership
and expertise of people of color regarding
inequality and injustice, it is also
critical to be committed to activism
in support of (in Andrea Dworkin's
words) "a single absolute standard
of human freedom and dignity."
And like the norms that further race
inequality, rules and customs which
treat gay men and lesbians as undeserving
of important legal or social benefits
fail to live up to any meaningful
interpretation of human freedom and
dignity.
So ultimately, this is what I have
to say to Jennifer:
Feminism is the struggle for equality,
freedom, and dignity, for all people.
Feminism is about recognizing that
where people are disproportionately
impacted by indignity, and poverty,
and violence, and harm, and disrespect,
there is inequality. Feminism is about
paying attention to quantitative information,
like statistics showing that Black
people are more likely to be stopped
by police, that women are at high
risk of being raped or battered by
men they know, and that gay and lesbian
youth are at increased risk of committing
suicide. And feminism is about listening
to the brave voices of people surviving
harm-like Black men wrongly sent to
death row, or women in prostitution,
or the woman you know from law school
who is smarter than virtually everyone
she meets, but whose intelligence
is often doubted by people who assume
she gets handed her accomplishments
because she is Black. Feminism is
about opening your eyes to ugliness
in the world, and believing, and standing
by, survivors of hate and violence
and disrespect. Feminism is about
learning from them what should not
happen, and it is about remembering
that we can do better. Feminism is
about seeing and fighting the privileges,
as well as the indignities, that accompany
inequality.
History notwithstanding, there is
enough dignity and freedom for everyone
in this world, and inequality is neither
biologically mandated, nor our destiny.
For me, feminism is: seeing that equality
does not yet exist; believing I have
a duty to work for the day it does;
being accountable to those who are
less privileged than me; and never
forgetting that as a white woman with
a husband, I benefit from some of
the inequalities that I oppose. And
now that I am a mom, feminism for
me is about recognizing that my son
may grow up to fall in love with a
man, or a woman, a person of color,
or someone white, and that in any
event, I want this world to be safe,
loving, and respectful, of whoever
he becomes, and whatever family he
creates.
Kaethe Morris Hoffer
[email protected]
